I used to believe that happiness was defined by material things and objects. I used to believe that happiness was a status, a destination, a place that we all work towards. So to me, happiness was going to school, making good grades, interning, then graduating, then landing a dream job, then making money, and finally buying all of the things I used to dream and saving a large amount of “rainy day money.” I was totally wrong and out of touch with true happiness.
the state of being happy.
I had to go without in order to learn the true definition of happiness which by definition is the state of being happy. My path looked more like this: I went to school, made good grades, interned, graduated, landed a nightmare of first job, made very little money, quit nightmare job, no other job prospect, could barely afford grocery, and rent became a source of anxiety. So, by my own definition I wasn’t happy, I should be miserable. But I wasn’t, I wasn’t miserable. I was HAPPY! In fact, I’ve never been happier than I was at that moment or happier than I am right now.
How is this possible? Because happiness isn’t about goals, or paths, or material things. Happiness isn’t tangible, its intangible. It is something we feel, not something we see or something that we can hold on too. I was/am happy, because I just was/am. There is no real explanation, no real definition. It is simply a state of mind, and only you can control your mind. I am happy, alive, and healthy.
Three months later and almost one year since graduation, those things that I want are finally starting to fall into place. I am happy regardless. I was happy before they fell into place and I’ll continue to be happy even if they fall out of place. I am alive and well and thats finally enough for me.